OK, so The Onion isn’t exactly a real news source on a par with the NYT or the WSJ. But it is a great read when you need a little humor to brighten the work day. This article on how Goldman Sachs is supposedly sequestering its single honest and decent employee in a secluded cubicle is right on the money. It describes the lengths to which a morally bankrupt employer must go to preserve the innocence of such a worker. The tiny cubicle with its head high walls serves as a sanctuary from the surrounding environment of corporate malfeasance. The worker within is protected from any communication with management so he won’t accidentally learn of fraudulent activities that he would then be forced to report to the authorities. All he has to do each day is avoid intentionally breaking the law. Nice work if you can get it!

On a More Serious Note:

Have you ever noticed that undesirable employee behaviors seem to be contagious at work? Do you ever wish you could take all your best and brightest employees and separate them from the type of poorly performing coworkers whose bad habits are sure to rub off on them? Perhaps there’s a way to do that without having to be too obvious about it.

You don’t have to physically move your employees to cut down on the cross-pollination of bad attitudes and office gossip. Instead, consider simply increasing the height of the cubicle walls in strategic locations. Panel extenders let you set up visual and auditory barriers that can direct the flow of conversation to bypass cubicles where workers need to be able to concentrate. These boundaries can give your cheerful and motivated employees the room they need to grow and flourish!